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Monday, May 17, 2010

Life is a Mirror

Courtesy: www.trans4mind.com/healing/reality

An explanation of how our outer reality is a mirror of our inner reality:

THE LAWS OF THE UNIVERSE

~ YOU CREATE 100% OF YOUR REALITY AND NO ONE CAN CREATE IN YOUR REALITY BUT YOU.

~ IT'S NEVER ABOUT ANOTHER PERSON, PLACE, OR THING.

~ EVERY PERSON, PLACE, OR THING IS A MIRROR AND HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BE A GIFT FOR YOU.

~ AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT, YOU EITHER ARE GIVING LOVE, OR ASKING FOR LOVE.

~ EVERYTHING IS GOD, FOR GOD IS ALL THERE IS. THEREFORE, I AND YOU MUST BE GOD, TOO.

When I attach a value and a meaning to some event, I am creating a perception. In other words, it is my choice how to interpret what happened. I will usually interpret an event by seeing it through whatever issues or beliefs I already have going on inside of me. In other words, how I choose to see something, the perception I have of an event, is not necessarily what is happening, but how I choose to view it. If I have anger, I will likely interpret what someone says as sounding angry. If I clear myself of internal issues, I can choose to and will be able to interpret "and create" things from a higher vibrational state. Whatever perceptions I have, and then living by those perceptions, determines the reality I will have.

Here is an example: you are walking down the street, and a dog begins barking at you. If you choose to live by the Laws which state that you create your own reality, you will say to yourself: "I am creating that dog barking at me. That dog is a mirror of something going on inside of me. What in me is making that dog bark at me?" Then you may discover that you were actually feeling a lot of fear, or anger, maybe you weren't even consciously aware at the moment that you were feeling fearful or angry about something, and the dog sensed your fear or anger and barked. The dog reacted to something fearful, some energy of fear or anger that it felt from you. In that way, the dog was a mirror of what you were feeling. You felt fearful or angry when the dog barked, and that alerted you to the fact that you had to be feeling that inside of you to create it happening on the outside.

Then you have an opportunity to look within and figure out what you are feeling fearful or angry about, get clear, and heal it. That would be the way to "perceive" what just happened if you are willing to accept that you create your own reality. If, however, you do not take responsibility and accept that whatever is going on inside of you will manifest as an event, a mirror, in your outer world, then you would "perceive" the situation more like this: "I'm not doing anything! Why did that stupid dog bark at me! Someone ought to have trained it better than to let it bark and scare people. What a mean, stupid dog. Sacred me half to death!" And then nothing gets looked at internally, and there is no opportunity to heal.

Here is another example: as a small child, I see my father being angry. My perception of that event is that I am the reason he is angry - if I were a better child he wouldn't be angry. This perception then becomes a part of my life. I have a perception that I am a bad person, and therefore I always perceive that people are angry at me. Or, I relate to others in fear.

If you perceive or make a decision somewhere along the way that you are a "bad" person and responsible for other people's emotions, for making them feel "bad", then you will go through life hating yourself, thinking you are "evil", perhaps without knowing it. You may feel constantly ashamed and guilty. You will continue to create situations where you feel bad about yourself, where you think you have done something wrong. You will, in all likelihood, create your life where things always seem to go wrong, and relationships and life will probably become a fearful thing for you.

And, all of this will change as your perception and understanding of how the universe works becomes clearer - such as the understanding that no one can create the reality of another. And your life will also change when any false perceptions you have about yourself, as well, are made conscious - and you change them.

When you know that you are responsible ONLY for what you believe and what you feel, and when you KNOW that others are responsible only for what they feel and believe, that feelings and beliefs about reality can only come from within, from what each person chooses to believe, there is no longer shame or blame, guilt or self hatred. Then you have the opportunity to believe and create your life in any way you choose - in a good way that works for you. You no longer believe it if others try to blame you, and you no longer blame anyone else for your life. That is being the CREATOR of your life. You choose consciously, not unconsciously, what you want to believe - you perceive yourself and life and others in a way that is positive and allows life to work harmoniously for you.

If you remain a victim, in victim consciousness, things don't change, because victims never heal. How can they, if they never accept that they are the ones responsible for creating life that way in the first place? You can't change something if you don't think you created it to begin with - or, if you don't believe that you even HAVE the power to create or change anything. Victims remain stuck, thinking it's someone else's fault, and that someone else has the power over their life, to create their life a certain way, instead of themselves.

As soon as I give up 100% responsibility for creating my own reality, as soon as I give up the responsible role, as soon as I think someone is doing something to me, I have become a victim. Other's responses to me are, in reality, only a reflection of my own energy, a reflection of whatever energy I am putting out, or have inside of me.

In other words, if you have a perception that someone is a hurtful person, you must have a belief that you will be hurt. They then just play the role for you that you are expecting. You create what you believe in.

When I come from the lower vibrational state, I will be viewing things as judgments. I will make judgments about myself or about another. The higher vibration is to see whatever happens as a mirror of myself in the Now: "I see you doing that. I want to judge you for it. Instead, I will see that it is a reflection of the energy I either hold in myself, or have held in myself. So, I realize that I do that, or have done that."

I ask myself, "Am I still doing that? Where do I still hold that judgment (which I want to put out on you) about myself - where do I still think that I am not ok?" I identify the judgment I'm making against myself. I ask: "What part of me do I still not love, and therefore I judge it?" Then I look at the other person and think: "I don't need to judge them. They are simply being a mirror of my own issue." I ask: "What in me created that in my reality?" In reality, all of us are really asking for love, which is what we all truly want.

Saying: "What is the mirror to me?" instantly removes the judgment. Then there is no charge. There is only acceptance. Acceptance is the higher vibration. It is above forgiveness, because forgiveness implies that something has been done wrong. Acceptance says all is happening perfectly, as it should. All is perfect. Whatever is happening enables us to grow, if we look at it from being the Creator, not the victim. If we look at it all as perfect, we immediately move into the energy of Love, Trust, and Peace. Then there is no judgment. If it's complicated, it's not Truth.

Know that if you feel anger or any other unpleasant or uncomfortable emotion, you must carry that energy within you. It isn't because of what someone else did. The situation just reflected what was already there in you. Then you have the opportunity to see what the mirror is for you, to see what you carry within yourself so that you can heal, grow, and change - therefore, seeing your reflection in another or in a situation is a positive and useful thing.

Thought triggers emotion. See what kind of thoughts you are thinking, and what kind of emotion that creates. Tune into how you feel. Use your 5 senses to ask if something doesn't feel right or comfortable in the way you are responding or feeling. If you don't like the emotion you are feeling, change the thoughts you are thinking. Get a new perspective, in other words. Healing comes from the #3 law - taking responsibility.

The word emotion is a fascinating word. Look at it this way: E-motion, or Energy, put into motion. That is what our emotions do. They move energy and bring things into motion, or manifestation. The force behind what we feel is what allows us to create. First we have our thought, or perception. But it is the emotional energy, the fuel, that allows something to get created. "I felt so strongly about that that I had to rush out and do it". Therefore, to create in a positive way, we must generate positive emotions from clear thoughts and perceptions.

Lower vibration                Higher vibration
expectation                     responding from compassion
judgment                        observing
rejection/blame               acceptance
sorrow/apologizing           seeing the mirror

Fear is only a mask of your true desire. You need to find out what your true desire is, and state that desire 100% positively: "I choose to have or create...."

There are 3 universal fears:
(1) abandonment
(2) not feeling worthy or good enough
(3) loss of trust which = fear of surrender
Any time there is a fear, it will fall into one or more of these categories. Check out what your fear is about.

You will continue to create the same kind of situations, you will keep yourself in judgment, you will reinforce the lower vibrational state of thinking it's someone else's fault, and you will keep yourself in the perception of being victimized, until you get out of the program and have a new perception.

Exercise to find out what your fear or masked desire is:

To find out and work with your fear, or masked desire, first state what you fear - say or write the negative expression of it: all that you think is going on, what bothers you, who you think did what to you, another's flaws, etc.

Make a list - in one column write down all your fears and/or the negative attributes of a situation or of someone. In the other column, turn that around and become aware that all that you see is actually inside of you - your own perception of yourself - your own issues. Write it that way in the second column.

For example, in one column you may have written: "Amy has no sense of self esteem. I hate that in her." Then, in the other column, you turn that into: "I feel that I have no sense of self-esteem. I hate that in myself," or "I have a belief that I am not powerful, _____ etc. etc."

ALL BELIEFS THAT CAUSE YOU FEAR ARE ERRONEOUS. This exercise will help you see what your erroneous beliefs are that keep you in fear, that create the difficulty you are in, that make you see your own issues in others and judge them for it, and that keep you from manifesting what you want.

The number one addiction to an erroneous core belief, what keeps you in it, comes from feeling guilt and shame. That's what makes us not want to see these issues as our self. In reality, there is no shame or guilt. There is only growth and Love. If you treat yourself lovingly, you will be able to see that when you face an issue in yourself, you have the chance to become even clearer, ever more loving. And that is the perfection of the journey, of what we experience, of seeing ourselves in the mirror.

Exercise for determining the Ultimate Truth about yourself:

Next, say or write your preferred truth, expressing what you choose to create, as 100% positive. Use all positive words. Then put your highest truth in the form of an "I Am" statement. For example: "I AM powerful" or "I AM a loving, wonderful human being," or "I AM able to love myself." Continue to say your positive I Am statement throughout the day and for as long as you need to, until the negative program is neutralized.

Here is the cycle of an erroneous core belief loop:
- You feel guilty.
- You judge something or someone, including yourself.
- You feel guilty about doing that.
- Then you become fearful that you will be punished.
- You feel shame, and you hide it all away so you're not aware the issue is really even there, that it's yours.
- In order to get away from the shame, or deal with it in some way, you blame others. This is called projection. You put it out on someone or something else.
- You feel guilty about doing that and the loop goes on.

How to re-program an old belief:

Own the fear or pattern. See how you react to a given situation - look at what you are afraid of. Ask: "What keeps me believing in that fear? What will happen if I let go of it? What is the pay off for keeping it? What do I get to do or not do if I keep the fear?"
Decide if this pattern serves you anymore. Decide if you want to keep the program, or change it. If you decide to keep it, observe why, without judgment.
If you decide to change it, decide what you want to change it to, exactly. Be specific. You must have a new belief, a choice for a new perception. If you choose to believe in a new reality, you eliminate fear.
Put out your intention - what you intend to create. Say: "I intend to_____." You can even state how you will do it, step by step. Your intention must be followed by willingness.
Ask Spirit, your Highest Self, for guidance or help to achieve the new intention. State your new reality in the form of "I Am_____."
Now, most importantly allow yourself to FEEL very clearly and strongly what it would FEEL like to operate out of and have that new belief in your life. What would you FEEL? Let that feeling flow into every cell of your body.
Intention, or a new thought form, plus emotion creates the transformation into new ways of being and brings about the new pattern you are choosing.

"E - Motion" means: deep feelings are the Energy that puts things into Motion. Got that?

This creates Joy, Growth, Freedom!!
What could be better than that?
Worth doing the work to get it?

Fears have supported us, and we tend to want to hold onto them through our anger or other emotional reactions because it's the only way of life we've known. Fears can be survival tools, but will keep you locked in a lower vibration that doesn't help your life.

These are energy sucking ways of behaving, out of fear:
- Being aloof.
- Being an interrogator ("Who did this?! Why did you....?! Didn't you realize that...?!" etc.).
- Being an intimidator (energy makes others feel afraid of you - backing people down).
- Being someone who creates confusion for others (gets them off center).
- Being a "poor me."

If you find yourself worried or fearful about what other people think, the mirror of that really is: you are in judgment of yourself.

If you are in doubt, you are caught between realities and aren't sure what to believe.

If you are in fear, you are actually holding a belief that you are inadequate to deal with something.

A fear of judgment is actually a desire for unconditional love.

If you are in pain, you are in resistance to something. What are you resisting? Identify what you are getting by holding onto the pain.

Change the perception that there was any damage done in a given situation. If you are the creator, then you created that situation for some reason. What was the reason?

If you are in pain, you are judging. Move instead to acceptance. It is all perfect. Ask: What is the gift of the mirror for me here?

If you are asking why, you are into blaming. Go to your heart, instead. There is no war happening, unless you create one by your perception.

If you are in resistance to something, you are trying to be in control, and you are fearing a loss of power. It is a false belief that you will lose control or power, because:

If you identify with God, if you know that you ARE God, that is POWER. And that is all there is. It's already working out perfectly. And everything else is God, too.

Everything is already perfect, and there is no need for you to try to control anything. It is impossible to do so, anyway.

What you CAN create is responding from Peace and living from higher vibrational states. That then creates a reality that will mirror that higher vibrational state.

The role of the ego:

It is the ego which allows us to be in this reality where there is duality. That is why we see this reality with 2 eyes. But, we must understand the Higher Truth - that all is One, One Energy Source - and that perception comes with seeing from a single eye, the spiritual eye. The ego's true purpose is to offer us choice by comparison. It helps us decide what we want to experience and learn in this lifetime. The ego controls emotions. We need it for our wide range of emotions, which we learn from - in this way we learn to work with energy and use it appropriately. Self sabotage is the ego in its lower vibration.

Listen to the Higher Self. The ego was designed to deal with polarity - neither side of which is the real truth. The Higher Truth is larger than, bigger than, either side of polarity. It is the point in the middle, the zero point, the neutral point where there is no attachment.

Honor where someone is in their development, what lessons they have set up to learn for themselves.

Using these laws will help you to allow others to express themselves, while you remain at peace.

Accept WHAT IS as Perfection, then use your
power of choice to create the reality that you prefer.



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Tuesday, May 04, 2010

Forgiveness

Someone wrote to me "The harder you try, the more difficult it becomes to forgive and the more you try to forgive the more others do things which make you change your mind. I don't know what is right."


Another said, "How do I forgive? It is so hard to do so."


Another said, "How can I forgive with such a complex mind?'


Another said, "I have forgiven but the other person has not forgiven."


Yet another said, "How do I react when I meet the person who caused hurt to me and I have forgiven?"

Yeah, I put all that in red as it is an alarming situation. In the past few days there have been questions in the similar line. Why I put up this question and the article following it here is because many face this problem of forgiveness. Some find this topic or subject itself boring as who has the time to think about it all? Some feel they have better things to do that to think about forgiving all and all that comes with it. Some feel that the people who brought them so much of problems or suffering cannot be pardoned so quick.  Some think this is only saintly business and all these saintly topics and acts are only limited to saints or scriptures or religious texts.

Is that all? NO

Forgiveness is not something that you give to someone else but it is what you give to yourself. Forgiveness is not a saintly business, it is all about your own daily business. (Saints always thought about others/you; that shows the significance of their teachings). By forgiving you are not helping others you are helping yourself a great deal. Instead of focusing on how others would benefit with your forgiveness, you will know how you have benefited yourself by forgiveness. 

First, you have to understand what is forgiveness and what is it that you need to forgive. Once you understand and put to practice these things, you will notice that forgiveness is not as hard as it looked. Firstly, you have to re-look into these myths.
  • "It is not easy to forgive."  It is very easy if you learn the art of letting go and releasing. Forgiving means detaching or letting go or releasing that emotion within you that excites so many other emotions like fear, ego, anger, guilt, etc. So one must understand that the feeling of resentment is what has to be released to forgive. Resentment is that emotion that got caught up within you while the other person caused you harm. This emotion is the real culprit not the person. We actually cling on to the person. For if it is anyone to blame, blame yourself for holding on that thing deep within you which is so harmful. You are unknowingly giving birth to many other negative emotions and thus giving rise to disease of the mind and body. So, you feel it is not easy to forgive because you are holding on to the person and every time you think of the person, you feel more angry, etc. Long suppressed ill feelings or anger and resentment eventually lead to cancer. If you cannot release it, your body will try to release it in its own form and thus erupt in a disease. So how do you prefer to release?? The understanding and knowledge of what problems nonforgiveness can bring to you itself will make you want to drop that resentment you have held so dear. 
  • "It is embarrassing to go and ask for forgiveness or I am scared to ask for forgiveness." You don't need to confront the person whom you have to forgive. Forgiveness is something that you practice on yourself. If you are able to silently release the guilt or ill feeling towards that person, you have forgiven. If possible to confront and express it out rightly, then it will help a great deal because you are doing it with mind, body and soul. But if you feel this is not possible due to some reason, then master the technique of release the emotions. Meditation helps a great, great deal in this, where you sit in quiet in meditation
  • "I have forgiven but the other person has not."  It does not absolutely matter what the other person is up to. It is their life agenda and their problem. There are methods which work on both the parties involved. Meditation and visualization. Keep visualizing and feeling truly that you are sending love to that person, hugging that person and that person also is loving you in return. In the start it may not be easy but eventually your mind will catch up and you will see it becoming easier. What will follow next may be unbelievable but with time you will notice that the person who did it to you also is able to oversee this problem between you and him/her. This happens by The Law of Attraction. The ultimatum here however is not on the other person but how you release that emotion from your system.
  • "The harder you try, the more difficult it becomes to forgive and the more you try to forgive the more others do things which make you change your mind." Here the focus is on someone else's plate. These are all similar problems in life where one wants to forget someone but cannot, one wants to forgive someone but cannot, one wants to keep off a bad habit but cannot, one wants to practice meditation but cannot, one wants to change diet for health reasons but cannot, one wants to achieve something but cannot, and the list is endless. Why is this? Because the focus is not on what you want actually but it is on what you don't want. Likewise, when you want to forgive you are focusing on the person and they did to you all the time. Anytime and every time you think of the person all those horrific memories unwind in front of you and you undergo the same trauma in the present that you experienced in the past. What you are doing is actually re-living those moments and feeling all those bundle of negative emotions all over again to throw you into turmoil and make it even harder to get out of it. That is why you feel it is becoming harder. Release. Let go. Unclutch. All those memories and hurt are nothing but your ego that is being hurt again and again. "How could he/she do this to me?"  "I have been taken advantage of." " What happened to me is not justified." You may have thousands of reasons but know that nothing in life is injustified. Everything has a valid reason. Knowing the Law of Karma will clear this. It is my personal experience that with understanding of the Law of Karma only I have been able to let go of a lot of things in life that does not hold right for my highest good.
  • The person who hurt me is now in peace because I have forgiven." This is such a foolish statement and expression. One is not at peace because the other is at peace! All these are only the conceptions of your mind. Mere imaginations. This would mean that the forgiveness has not taken place because the focus is still on the person and not within. In fact, with real forgiveness one will be more calm and at peace. In actuality, when you forgive and are at peace it is other person who may not be at peace. See, the very intention of someone try to hurt you is to see you unhappy and if you are happy you have not let them do what they actually wanted :) With practice you will not entertain the thoughts of that person and even if the thought comes one one will feel love and at ease. When this happens know that you have truly forgiven. For forgiveness goes hand-in-hand with acceptance and unconditional love. This is something that is practically difficult but not impossible.
  • "How do I behave when I have to meet the person again?" Again, this worry and anxiety will not occur if you have truly forgiven. There is nothing to run away from someone because the moment you truly release the resentment, you will have no fear, embarrassment, hate, etc when you confront them again. You will be at peace. It is human to have some reactions at that moment, but be happy that you are achieving your goal of that emotion not causing any turmoil within you. Moreover, these are opportunities presented by life to re-check how much you have really been able to forgive that person. If you feel there is still something left in you, then do not brood over it; rather work on it with more dedication and you shall achieve it. If you take things this way then you will yourself be looking forward to confront that person again to check your progress. :) 
That is what is most important that anything else. Refuse to take in anyone's hurt. It is always the mind that creates and mind that suffers, nothing else. So give the mind some rest. I believe, you must be having better things to do in life than to keep thinking of the person who wants to see you unhappy.

This is why all saints and masters of all religion preached and practiced the art of forgiveness. They are not mere dogmas or doctrines to be followed only in church or temple or mosques, but to be made a part of daily life. Christ while being tortured and killed by the Romans simply did not look up and say, "Father, forgive them for they do not know what they are doing." It is what came naturally to Christ through the power of unconditional love.

The best weapon to dissolve resentment is unconditional love. Loving everything that comes your way. If this is practiced and master much more can be achieved than just being able to forgive.

To conclude, forgiveness is not difficult. It is the best thing that can happen to you and your growth. Put it into practice than just point fingers at someone else. You are responsible if you allow external negativities to enter within you and start dominating you. Love, accept, forgive. Mastering this you have mastered a great aspect of yourself knowingly or unknowingly.


Stay blessed!



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