Thus we see that hurt, anger, resentment, etc are all the emotions of the ego. Once you know the technique of not letting anything external to hurt you, then you will know how simple it is to be happy. The ego is actually so strong that it will not even spare the self. How many times have you observed yourself crying over your own shortcoming, getting angry with yourself for your own mistake, and cursing your own self for a blunder. The ego sometimes even does not want to forgive the own self. That is how powerful the ego is. If one cannot forgive one’s own error how is it possible that one can forgive others? Till there is no quality of forgiveness in oneself know that ego is very strong in that person. Mahatma Gandhi rightly said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”
How easily does one get hurt when someone criticizes. Someone blames you for something you have not done. Someone criticizes you for your actions that were misunderstood. Someone tells you that you are a bad person when you know it isn’t right. What do you do? You get angry, upset, sad, etc depending on how you have taken it. But there are a smaller fraction of people who don’t react to it. I was watching 'Awakening with BramhaKumaris" last night and Shivani Behn explained this situation beautifully. She said when such a comment or words come from someone, the first thing to do is without reacting to think what was said; was it right or wrong. Like, if someone said you are a selfish person, stop and think whether you really are. If you really are, then there is nothing to feel bad because that is what is really a part of you that was seen by the other person and conveyed to you. In this case, without reacting accept that you are going to work on this negative aspect in you. Now, on the other hand, if you stop to think and know that you are not selfish then what is there to worry or react? You know what the other person said is not you, so just ignore the remark and get going happily knowing that you are not what was mentioned. Millions of souls out there and thus millions of opinions people may have of you but that certainly does not mean that you are all of them; it is not true! So there is no point in reacting to each and every statement. You have to understand that reaction does not change anything in the one who has the view but reactions do cause you worry, hurt and unrest. Stop, think whether it was right or not. If it was right work on it, there is nothing to react because it is true. If it was not right then, again, there is nothing to react because it is not true! What an important step towards your own peace and soul growth! As soon as I saw this example been mentioned on Aastha Channel I pulled out my laptop and wrote this article. It is indeed such a beautiful approach towards self-development and such a beautiful approach towards erasing worries out of our lives.
Take this approach and you will see two things happening in your life:
1. You will never react and when you don’t react there will be no worries and you will always be peaceful and happy.
2. Your quality of life will start improvising because now at every step you are automatically finding yourself analyzing yourself and thus making conscious efforts to change for good!
You never notice these small observations in life but when you observe these things carefully you will notice how the unnoticed ego plays such havoc in our lives. Each such small step we take, know that we are moving towards a better life, a life which we crave to make beautiful with so many complicated methods. So many courses are attended and so much of money is spent on trying to achieve the two golden words – happiness and peace. You can empower yourself with such small techniques as this and implement them in your daily lives and slowly you will be surprised to see your life manifesting peace and joy and radiating that peace and love to others, which automatically will again create more exchange of love and peace from others.
So, if you say “I am hurt” or “He hurt me” or “I have suffered” it is all because of your allowing those external factors to affect you. In your lifetime you are bound to come across people and situation which may not be in synchronicity with your soul but then for every such person or situation, stop, think and act in the two steps I mentioned above and life will never disappoint you. Refuse to be polluted by other’s negativities and at the same time stop to check your own negativities and pluck them out of you. These are the powers that are inherited by your soul but something that you have forgotten. Think about it. Stay blessed!